6 posts tagged “god”

     On the way to Midtown Family Vacation, we were instructed to play this game called "Hot Seat," which basically is getting asked a lot of questions. Somehow my session equalled deep stuff quick, and the topic of a calling was brought up. It's weird I have been thinking about callings a lot lately and in different ways. I pretty much said that I have no idea what my calling is right now and I'm trying to seek it out and be obedient with it, but that I did want to live in Seattle for an extended period of time at some point (preferably after college).

            I think that there is a desire placed at the heart of every human being. That desire is the desire to be loved unconditionally. It is not easily satisfied; in fact there is only one way to satisfy it, yet everyone tries to fill this desire with things that are incapable of doing so, and therefore the unfulfilled desire drives us to feeling empty.

            With most searches efforts are put on the things that are close to each person and easy to do/access. Each person from the youngest age starts to conform to a “standard” portrayed by the people around them. If they can just fit in, then they will have the acceptance and love that they desire. We have gone from reading Goosebumps to buying Mountain Hardware jackets, but we can never do enough, styles change and we are always one step behind. It is a fruitless chase.

            We look to people to fill this need. At a young age we start with our parents. We do things to get them to show us their affection toward us. A lot of us have good parents who love us unconditionally; a lot of us don’t have good parents. Even these people, the people who are put in our lives to love us and raise us sometimes fail. As we get older we move from seeking the love of parents to the love of peer(s).

            The easiest way to see this course of action is to look at dating. We feel the need to start “dating” in the second grade, with tiny notes that say “check yes or no” that let us know if we were worthy of dating the person we wanted to. Looking at college students it is even easier to see the desire of unconditional love in them. They have given up what is sacred, reserved for a spouse, in seeking this love from someone. Girls use sex to have an emotional connection with a guy, and sometimes the guy is too, but a lot of times the guy just wants to do his business and be done with it.

            It kills me so much to see a person put their entire being into something to be cast away as not good enough to the person they were hoping to love them. The problem is that they are seeking an unconditional love from a person who is incapable of doing so. The only being that can fill this desire is God Himself.

            It’s weird because anyone else who would know everything else about us would look at us and say “No.” Yet God, who knows more about us than we do, looks at us and loves us more than anyone else in the world could ever do. Yet we still seek love from other avenues. This is death. They are unable to fulfill this. We need to look to God.

            It is a great feeling when someone who cares for you goes out of their way to show it you. It really is. How much better is it that the God who created the universe decided to manifest himself in human form and live among us. It’s really impossible to imagine this entirely. Perfect God comes to hang out with awful humans, who have distorted the way life should be lived into something wretched. Yet God did become a human and dwell among us, all because God loved us so much he wanted to deliver us from all the ways we try to fill the void within us.

            1 John 4 talks about love. It says that we can love God because He first loved us, unconditionally. All we have to do is love Him back, we don’t even have to be good at it. The void is filled. Our lives changed forever. Just accept His love. It’s not always easy, but it is the best thing anyone can ever do.

     I've decided that in my relationship with God that it looks like that I am God and he is not. I know that right now you are crying blasphemy, but hear me out, I'll tell you why it looks that way and that I know it is wrong and I should change it soon. This terribly wrong relationship dynamic is most visible in my prayer life, and by prayer life I mean the list that I give God that I would like Him to complete for me.

For a while now I have had the feeling that I am ready to get out of college and move to the next part of my life. When I tell this to people who have already graduated they pretty much think I am a huge idiot, making me think on if it is really college that I want to be done with. It is not actually, it is something that I have come to associate with college.

I have this view of college as a time of preparation. In my mind it prepares me for my career (whatever that is), as well as being the time period where I grow, spiritually, into what I need to be to do whatever I am called to do. So in my mind when I am in college I am preparing to do something, and when I am out of college I actually get to do whatever I have been prepared for.

So it isn't college that I am ready to be done with. I am ready to be done preparing for my calling. I am ready to be called and to live the life that goes along with whatever it is I am called to do. The main problem with this is that I don't actually have any earthly idea what I am called to do. I feel that even in this time of preparation if I knew the call I could be working toward something specific and getting excited about whatever it was I was to be doing.

In my mind, and I don't know if this is valid or not, I believe that living the life that God intended you to live, the life where you rely on him and work for His kingdom, is the one that is most fulfilling. I know that it is not going to be the easiest life to live, but the reward for it is much greater than living for myself and my plans.

I absolutely believe that God has called each of his children to a certain thing for ushering in his Kingdom. I do not at all think that "to be called" means that you are going to preach on Sundays, go to seminary and plant a church. I do believe people are called to do that, but I think that my God is a creative God and can work outside (and along with) that one specific calling.

The problem that I just kind of realized within myself that I may be all talk. If I genuinely want to find out my calling in life, why am I not on my face right now in the presence of the Most High trying to figure it out. Why wouldn't I fast regularly to find it out. What inside of me wants this so bad, but refuses to work for it. Now I know that we can't work for anything, but I think that pursuing something hardcore shows God your desire for Him and His plan over yours and is what is needed for some great "revelation" or whatever you want it to happen.

So here is where I need to check myself. I need to do those things. I need to spend so much time with God. I need to examine His word and love it. I need to fast and seek wise counsel. Just wanting something and not doing anything to get it is no good. So here marks the beginning of me pursuing the quest of finding my call instead of waiting for God to get sick of waiting and letting me know what it is without the work.

    One thing that Columbia lacks is beauty. I realize that sounds kind of harsh, and downtown is nice and all, but I'm a nature kind of guy. Driving I-26 between Columbia and Greenville makes me miss trees a lot. The beauty of dark oranges, full yellows and reds, is just amazing for me.
    Creation is something that shows me God. Romans 1:20 says "For since the creation of the world his invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse." The main one that sticks out to me in the list of what have been displayed throughout time, is His eternal power. He is in control of nature. That is powerful.
    Man can do amazing things. They can build ridiculously amazing buildings that have cool architecture and the most up to date technology that makes impossible things seem easy. But in all of our conquering the world, we still do not have the capability to be more powerful than God. Buildings can fall with numerous things, hurricanes, earthquakes, tsunamis, and so much other stuff.
    No matter what, there are things we can not control. They are out of our hands. They are in His. There was this one time when Jesus was taking a nap on a boat. A good percentage of his disciples are fisherman, yet they wake Jesus up saying "Save us, Lord; we are perishing!" (Matthew 8:25). Jesus looks at them and says (my paraphrase version ;)) "Why are you acting like little girls?" Then he gets up, and rebukes the winds and the sea, and they became perfectly calm. The definition of rebuke is "to express sharp disapproval or criticism of (someone) because of their behavior or actions." So Jesus pretty much was like, "Listen here nature. I'm not OK with this happening." Then nature listens to Him. There is calm.
    I don't know about you, but I can't walk outside when it is raining and say, "OK, nature, I disapprove of it raining right now," and have anything stop. Jesus can. He made the universe, sustains it, and controls it. It's amazing.
    No matter what new inventions or methods we produce, we are not God. It's time for us to stop acting like it and worship the One with the power of the universe in His hands.