2 posts tagged “calling”
On the way to Midtown Family Vacation, we were instructed to play this game called "Hot Seat," which basically is getting asked a lot of questions. Somehow my session equalled deep stuff quick, and the topic of a calling was brought up. It's weird I have been thinking about callings a lot lately and in different ways. I pretty much said that I have no idea what my calling is right now and I'm trying to seek it out and be obedient with it, but that I did want to live in Seattle for an extended period of time at some point (preferably after college).
For a while now I have had the feeling that I am ready to get out of college and move to the next part of my life. When I tell this to people who have already graduated they pretty much think I am a huge idiot, making me think on if it is really college that I want to be done with. It is not actually, it is something that I have come to associate with college.
I have this view of college as a time of preparation. In my mind it prepares me for my career (whatever that is), as well as being the time period where I grow, spiritually, into what I need to be to do whatever I am called to do. So in my mind when I am in college I am preparing to do something, and when I am out of college I actually get to do whatever I have been prepared for.
So it isn't college that I am ready to be done with. I am ready to be done preparing for my calling. I am ready to be called and to live the life that goes along with whatever it is I am called to do. The main problem with this is that I don't actually have any earthly idea what I am called to do. I feel that even in this time of preparation if I knew the call I could be working toward something specific and getting excited about whatever it was I was to be doing.
In my mind, and I don't know if this is valid or not, I believe that living the life that God intended you to live, the life where you rely on him and work for His kingdom, is the one that is most fulfilling. I know that it is not going to be the easiest life to live, but the reward for it is much greater than living for myself and my plans.
I absolutely believe that God has called each of his children to a certain thing for ushering in his Kingdom. I do not at all think that "to be called" means that you are going to preach on Sundays, go to seminary and plant a church. I do believe people are called to do that, but I think that my God is a creative God and can work outside (and along with) that one specific calling.
The problem that I just kind of realized within myself that I may be all talk. If I genuinely want to find out my calling in life, why am I not on my face right now in the presence of the Most High trying to figure it out. Why wouldn't I fast regularly to find it out. What inside of me wants this so bad, but refuses to work for it. Now I know that we can't work for anything, but I think that pursuing something hardcore shows God your desire for Him and His plan over yours and is what is needed for some great "revelation" or whatever you want it to happen.
So here is where I need to check myself. I need to do those things. I need to spend so much time with God. I need to examine His word and love it. I need to fast and seek wise counsel. Just wanting something and not doing anything to get it is no good. So here marks the beginning of me pursuing the quest of finding my call instead of waiting for God to get sick of waiting and letting me know what it is without the work.